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Plays, Novels and Film

    Life is a series of many sorrows and many happinesses. The sorrows are the breakages. But on looking back, if there had never been the prospect of any further sorrow,
    there could never have been the experience of new happiness. In my sorrows and in my happiness I am content.


    When did Brenda know?
    Drama-documentary on conversations in the Royal household before the assasination of Diana. Contains aspects of Racine's Neron. Needs a lot of futher background research.
    An original idea was to have a soldier standing to attention silently throughout the piece, and only have him move forward once, to speak to Brenda.
    ACT 1

    Conversation with Adolf Hitler
    The slow movement of Ravel's piano concerto shall be played whilst the audience enters. ACT 1. The following announcement of the play which follows shall be made. Adolf
    Hitler was beaten by his father incessantly every day of his life as a child for being bad. If Jesus was beaten very severely every day of his life as a child, how would he behave?
    The problem is not to see the genocide in others, it is to see the genocide in ourselves.

    Monologue between an actor, Reinhardt, on a chair on the left conversing with a portrait of Adolf Hitler on a chair on the right, questioning his lack of ambition compared with
    Reinhardt and why he did not extend his plans further. The actor declares his intention to tear up the portrait of Hitler, put it in a waste paper basket and vacuum the carpet. As
    he is about to do so, the voice of Adolf Hitler tells him to stop, sit down and listen to him. Reinhart is none other than Adolf Hitler himself, and he did all this. He goes on to
    describe everything the actor did in his career as Adolf Hitler, including that given in the Fourth Reich section, the death of Martin Bormann who was to join him, the role of
    Ettore Majorana in the Nazi bomb programme and why it was necessary to eliminate the Jews as a consequence, the U-boat carrying uranium supplies to New York, the
    advanced defences of his remote ranch in Argentina, the success of some aspects of the Argentinan themonuclear programme, the weekly flights of Klaus Barbie from Argentina
    to CIA headquarters, the necessary elimination of Evita Peron, the US moon programme, how he and Eva had three siblings and Eva ended up divorcing him, and how he enjoyed
    watching the moon landings on TV.

    Reinhardt is quite disturbed and begins to think of tearing up the portrait of Adolf Hitler, putting it in the bin and then continuing to vacuum the carpet. Hitler responds that he
    was beaten very severely by his father every day from a young age for being bad. He had kept his inner soul throughout his life because his inner pain that there existed despite
    all bombardments, an inner thread of love within that declared itself in communion with all life. This thread had protected him against all external urgings to destroy and beat up
    everything and anybody that opposed the will of Germany. Reinhardt rises up and stands still. Adolf Hitler then states. Before you begin the shreddings of your own mind in
    display of the wretchedness of mankind, think that you may wander about and declaim your thoughts on what troubles you, or finally repose in rest the deliberation exactly that
    what is of no use and must be confined as the rubbish of the mind, disarded in the bin, to the more important task of vacuuming the carpet. Reinhardts says, You speak my
    thought exactly, for the author of this play knows its actions with precision.

    ACT 2. Reinhardt explains why he had gone to see Albert Speer in Hull to find out why Speer, an intelligent man, had decided to follow Hitler and become his closest friend.
    On seeing the University meeting was closed to him, he had seen a man wearing electric blue, which Speer had said in a newspaper article Hitler liked for his suits. Being at the
    time in a delusional state due to taking drugs, he asked out 'Albert Speer, why are you here?' The man replied 'How did you know?' Reinhardt said Hitler had been frozen. Speer
    responded that Reinhart did not know that Hitler was still alive, and offered 50 million Swiss francs for the suggestion. Reinhardt replied he wanted only the bus fare back, and
    left. The next day, they met again on the stairs, and Speer again offered more Swiss Francs. Reinhardt said he did not want the money. Speer then threw gold coins at him, and
    Reinhardt had left. When someone asked if he wanted the coins, he had said 'If they are of no use to you, give them to the poor'. Some asked why he had said that, and in fright
    he had run off. Then Hitler divulges to Reinhardt that his assumed father is not his real father, but he, Hitler is his father. Reinhardt for half a minute becomes progressively more
    disturbed. For four minutes he goes totally deranged. Finally for half a minute he begins to calm down and eventually lies prostrate on the floor, as in the introduction to ACT 3.

    ACT 3. As Reinhart is lying motionless in semi-darkness on the floor in front of the two chairs, there is simultaneously a soft gong. A woman of slightly younger age enters
    stage right and moves to kneel down beside him. Reinhardt looks up and says 'Who are you'? She replies 'I am your sister Elaine'. He says 'I have no sister'. She says 'You have.
    Here is some strong black coffee. It will wake you up'. Reinhardt says 'I cannot accept (pause for a minute) who I am'.... He places the portrait of Hitler between his assumed
    mother and his assumed father on the dresser, and then moves the portrait of Hitler centre on the dresser with his assumed parents to one side. Walking back from the bathroom
    with the large white towel, Reinhardt spreads it out at right angles to the dresser. He kneels on the towel and says in a clear but broken voice 'Only God can help me'. The music
    of the slow movement of Bartok's third piano concerto, which is entirely classical and begins with an invokation of the sounds of the night, first muted, and then as background is
    heard. He lies prostrate on the white towel. With Reinhardt lying with legs and arms apart on the bathroom towel in front of the dresser, the scene dims, and only the window is
    showing the light of a new day. No other action happens except at the close of the music. Elaine moves to the dresser, picks a single red rose in a jar from it and lays it on the
    towel next to Reinhardt. She says: 'Rienhardt, pick up the rose. It is the dawning of a new day'. The play ends.


    The Destitute Capitalist
    A student, Jas, lives a charmed life in Cambridge. Moving north to own a cotton mill in Lancashire, he turns down an invitation from a Mr Marx in Manchester to expand
    his drapery business. The mill goes bankrupt, and Jas is wanders the streets asking for bread. Knocking at a door, a mill girl, seeing he has a posh accent, invites him in with
    'Ee, come in lad!' Their son works in the market at the age of nine selling safety pins. Jas devises increasingly bizzare schemes to make money and is sent to a lunatic asylum.
    His wife dies. Marx and Sieff becomes Marks and Spencer. At the funeral of his father, his son, unable to pay for the bus fare, is the only person there apart from the grave

    (SF) The Future is Known, the Past is Hidden
    In a society where the future can be predicted with certainty, C1 watches the results for the next election due in three months time. In the closest-run election ever, the
    Progressive Democratic Party will retain its majority which it has held for the past 1000 years. C1, C2 and C3 meet together because they notice they have the same death
    day. They discuss where they could go on holiday and the weather they will experience there. C2 decides to look at the archives of the Institute of History, and report back
    to the group. History is unknown before 2156, the date at which all data was erased and destroyed on the planet. Nevertheless, contemporaneous accounts after 2156 discuss
    the Third Hypnotic War which preceded it. It is known that Bornuj Daxa and the hypnotic general Ein-Eins were in control. Daxa died in mysterious circumstances and his
    body was frozen, C2 is unable to find where. Unusually, there is no recorded death of Ein-Eins at all. C2 obtains restricted information that had been overlooked from the
    archives. All elections are rigged. C1, C2 and C3 discuss attacking the government headquarters of the Progressive Democratic Party. C3 sees in a news flash that three
    terrorists will attack the headquarters of the Progressive Democratic Party in three weeks time, and will be shot dead. This is their death date. To defy the prediction, C1,
    C2 and C3 decide without weapons to declare the rigging of the elections by the Progressive Democratic Party. Making a declaration from the steps of the building, they
    are approached by armed robots, who shoot them dead.

    Escape from the country of Perfection (by Dogshitt)
    A perfect society has been built from the remains of a previous one. A man goes into a tourist information centre and asks how he can leave the country of Pefection. He is
    told that nobody has done that. Anyone leaving Pefection must forfeit eternal life. Continuing to insist, he is told it is possible to go on a distant trip to the Great Wall of
    Perfection, and it is possible to leave from there. Reaching the Great Wall, he walks to the exit point. In front of its huge unclimable ediface, he is confronted by armed
    guards telling him to stop, or he will be shot. He continues to walk towards the wall, and walks through it. It is an electronic mirage, a hologram. Walking along a pleasant
    country road, he has escaped.
    Life in the country of Perfection
    2. Problems at the Cavernous Ministry of the Unmentionable Bog
    3. The long transport to Blackerpond
    4. The flight to Vardick
    5. The view of the Temple of Pleasure
    6. The stop-over in Dogsplatter
    7. From Dogsplatter to the Great Wall of Perfection
    8. The guard post
    9. Journey along the Wall for 100 km
    10. Escape

    Delaration of Insanity from a Prison of the Mind
    1. Delusion, hyperdelusion and the conquest of mind.
    2. Kafka and the imprisonment of the soul.
    3. Helplessness in sadism of the flesh and slavery towards a new mind.
    4. Distance and the exclusion of resource. This composition speaks almost nothing to me. It is pitiable. I would like a performace accompanied live where it is revealed
    as innovative drivel.
    5. Declarations of intent.
    6. The British Imperialist Subentity argument on Brexit.


    We do not know by what process of evolution comedy for humans induces pleasure, and tragedy the experience of sorrow and pain. Whereas other sensations of pleasure
    and pain are physical, comedy and tragedy are cognitive. Comedy is when, say, someone puts down a banana skin and someone else, not knowing the banana skin is there,
    slips on it and hurts himself. Tragedy is when someone tells someone else that a banana skin is in the path, he knows, but he cannot change the route he is taking and must
    fall on it and be hurt. This then happens.

    26/11/2018. Berluttci, the Italian film producer I see in the BBC news has died today. I wish to see in these brief clips the same declaration of my Heart.

    (short) The Martian Ambassador
    Film type: Comedy. Plot: Casually dressed and wishing to establish diplomatic relations, the Martian ambassador is not allowed to enter the British embassy in Dublin.

    (short) Marcus's Inefficient Exercise Programme
    Film type: Training and comedy. Plot: The idea is that young people do tasks inefficiently which gives them more excercise, so to lose weight, we should put ourselves in
    an unplanned state of mind where we do physical things inefficiently, which is more interesting than repetitive exercise routines.

    (Youtube) Here is a more serious and complementary approach.

    (short) The Slab of Cheese
    Film type: Comedy. Plot: A man and his pregnant wife are going through a supermarket, but cannot pay for anything to eat. The man asks his wife to leave. He must do
    something, and he will provide for her. He goes to the supermarket cheese counter and purchases a very large cylindrical slab of cheese. He goes away and puts it down his
    track suit. He then walks to the supermarket exit with his trolley, where he has nothing to pay. He is stopped by the supermarket security man, who asks what the large bulge is.
    After some conversation, he says 'It is not a slab of cheese'. The supermarket security man confronts him with the fact that he has nowhere indicated that it is a slab of cheese,
    and therefore on what grounds should he assume that the person he is challenging should have come up with the idea, other than that he had a slab of cheese in his track suit?
    The man assures him that he had been thinking of a work of Socrates on slabs of cheese. The supermarket security man counters that Socrates never wrote such a work. The
    man reassures him that he did, and has a copy of it, which he presents to him. In shock, the supermarket security man sits down, to read the book: Socrates: Contemplations on
    a Slab of Cheese. He realises it is a fake, and it is Machievelli's The Prince with a false cover. He has been duped. Looking up, he realises the the man who had stolen the cheese
    is no longer there. Shouting for him to come back, he chases after him and disappears.

    The Discovery of Happiness, I, II and III
    Film type: Contains indications of straight and gay porn except where this occurs explicitly, parody of porn and political satire. A comedy experiment taking porn seriously,
    as it should be. I think it would work, but the political structure isn't there to finance it. Needs extensive further research into porn. This could be an interesting task to delegate
    to someone else! Fails to meet righteous expectations about exposure on public thoroughfares, anal intercourse and group sex. Porn is a pleasurable experience. It satisfies the
    need of releasing us from the thought control of the society which surrounds us, and indulging in the voyeurism of sexual experience which goes beyond the boundries of
    our inhibitions. Like reading a newspaper, it is representation and not fact. Whilst maintaining its integrity as porn, a slightly new idea might be that it is combined with the
    expression of social and political comment, and comedy. This interests me. The film is superficial and non-analytical. A good suggestion for anyone trying to write comedy is
    to study Aristophanes. All subsequent comedy is toned down and less funny because of that. Heavy grunting does not do all it should for me. I think it can partly be edited out.
    A fucking sound could be the sound of a squishy piston combined with a bit of the play doh material that produces a farting sound. This is unnatural, but if not too loud probably
    quite funny.
    Plot: Theresa May's government's plans to nationalise reproduction fail disastrously. In filming scenes, Virgin Porn director Adem Gabon-Kent (a look-alike of Clark Gable)
    explains his intentions. Are his attempts to flirt with biology student Lois doomed to failure, or will he find the right man?
    Locations: Brighton, Glasgow, train from Glasgow to Manchester, train from Manchester to Pontypridd, London, Athens and Edinburgh.

    The Soviet Tower of Strength Competition
    Film type: bodybuliding instruction manual and political satire. We must be led to believe this is not a rejection of Russia as it is today, but in an attenuated form an inspection
    of it, even within ourselves. Once again, there is a problem with finance, particularly since the gay population involved by implict innuendo in the film is about 12%. This might
    be enhanced by it being an instruction manual. Since it is serious political comment (which often makes bad comedy) it might have a market for that reason alone. New ventures
    take a long while to accept, so this film is in difficulties this way too. I would accept any offer of an American company to film this, provided its board of directors were not in
    control of its message or contents. It is a reflection on revolution, propaganda and the social systems that go with it. The film includes discussions of Russian history, its political
    system and Russian Orthodox doctrine. Russians may object that I was external to the Soviet system, and I am ignorant of Russian history, culture, society and its political
    system so that Russians would regard that I have no right to comment. Russian society is of interest to us all. I am expressing my opinion in that context. A deformity is its
    centralisation. Specifically libertarian in the October Revolution, I estimate the trend today is in the reverse. Wishing to release the human spirit in ways that authoritarians find
    objectionable, I state my case. I do not wish expressions of gay innuendo to be interpreted as an allegory of hate. Ignorant as I am of Russian literature, this love might be
    underlined by quotes which relate to classic Russian encounters. I wish to introduce the subversive idea that we may love Vadim Putin in ways as an authoritarian he would
    not wish me to express.
    Plot: In a competion like the Eurovision Song Contest, Vadim Putin is in a bodybuilding competition sensibly weighted by criteria for the leaders of the Soviet Union from
    Lenin to Yeltsin. In a peliminary interview on a relaxed arm chair, Putin is asked whether he feels nervous. He is asked what he thinks of Joseph Stalin, who is a bit of a
    Charles Atlas. The sequence is decided by selecting balls like the National Lottery. A breezy female presenter introduces each bodybulding session, where the competitors
    describe what they want Putin to do. Afterwards she interviews patriarchs of the Russian Orthodox Church about what they think of the performances. Occasionally there are
    action replays. Finally the presenter invites the viewers to vote. Joseph Stalin wins, and Putin does a final repeat with the winner. The film closes with a large crowd in a vast
    auditorium cheering.

    Necrophilia Tonight
    Film type: Comedy horror. Plot: Three ghouls, Michael Hurst, Vladivarb and Brodvig interested in football, decide that they can have necrophilia with the long dead Mary
    Whitehouse. Brodvig says he knows of no link of Mary Whitehouse with football, and Margaret Thatcher was younger and therefore less decayed. He knows from the Daily
    Mirror newspaper that Margaret Thatcher's husband was interested in cricket, which is a bit nearer. He suggests that after digging up Mary Whitehouse, they go to Westminster
    Abbey, bomb a hole in the crypt, and obtain two dead bodies for their enjoyment in the night instead of one. They take a bag of dynamite in a bag, someone else takes a
    detonator with a pluger handle at the top and the third takes a sleeping bag to drag along the body. Taking the bus to Westminster Abbey thay discuss the whereabouts of the
    remains of Mary Whitehouse, which they can google on the internet when they get back to 127 Rosemund Terrace. At Westminster Abbey, they knock on the door. A caretaker
    answers, and they ask to be conducted to the crypt to inspect the body of Margaret Thatcher. Having blown up the section with dynamite, the head of Margaret Thatcher becomes
    dismembered from the body, and has to be carried separately. An ear drops off and is put in Brodvig's bag of mints. They ask a policeman the drections back to 127 Rosemund
    Terrace, and take the bus back. An offer of a mint to a passenger in the bus is politely refused. They invite Morgentil, a next door neighbour, into the flat whilst Vladivarb
    stitches back Margaret Thatcher's head to her body. He makes a bad job of it, sticking her head the wrong way round and incomprehensibly her handbag to her bottom. Hurst
    is much annoyed at this incompetence, and asks: 'What is the country comng to? We cannot even stick Margaret Thatcher's head to her body the right way round! What on Earth
    is the reason for sticking Margaret Thatcher's handbag to her bottom? It is utterly, fabulously, incomprehensible beyond belief! It will take hours to undo and is a compete and
    utter mess! It will take hours and hours and hours to put right! Vladivarb, you are entirely to deal with dynamite from now on. This elaborate stiching is clearly beyond you, and
    I am now thinking beyond me too! Brodvig is looking at the Football Mortician results, and notes that Brian Clough is buried in Leeds. Hurst: 'Brodvig: what did you say?' 'I
    said Brian Clough was buried in Leeds'. 'Brodvig! You are a genius! Gentlemen, get your spades! We have along night-ride to fulfil'. (To Morgentil): 'Keep the body warm
    until we get back'. Outside in the midnight air at full moon, spades are thrown in the hearse. Brodvig exlaims: 'There is no room!' Hurst replies: 'Lie in the coffin, it is safe!'
    Brodvig moans: 'It is dark inside'. Hurst: 'Close the lid!' To owl hoots and screeching tyres the hearse accelerates outside 127 Rosemund Terrace, then to accompanying music
    of Monster Mash with subtitles the hearse careers through winding country roads with headlights blazing.

    The God of Football and its Cup of Love
    I was never a fan of football until I saw Pele play in my youth. I became instantly and subversively a fan of Brazil.

    Film type: Serious, then satire and fun.
    Plot: The first one third of the film is a natural account of lads playing football. One goes to the Manchester United Football Management School, where he is taught about
    transfer fees. The comedy appears half way through. In a class, a football is described as a square object with rollers underneath. A conference in Singapore discusses 'What
    is a football?'. An alien Rigelian decides to watch Manchester United and becomes a fan. An intermediate scene shows a 'fixed' football match set up for filming, but which
    it is decided to make real. A Saudi prince buys up all the world's football stadiums, and is advised by an accountant to turn them into car parks. A man and his son enter the
    world's first football car park, buying a football T-shirt and a football from the former Manchester United goalkeeper - a square object with rollers underneath. A Rigelian
    spacecraft descends and sets up new football stadia alongside football car parks for Rigelian fans. Football is resurrected with an excited Galactic audience, and transportation
    of teams to Rigel for away matches has to be arranged.

    The Shawl
    Film type: Serious.
    Plot: An exploration of the family life and customs of a Reform Jewish family through three generations. In each of the three stages a grandmother dies and leaves
    a shawl to her daughter. The daughter repairs the shawl. Finally the shawl contains no material of the original shawl, but is still the same shawl.

    Film type: Documentary. U is an asylum seeker. An early document about him is in the Politics and Human Rights section.
    Plot: I want to show him in his own words and his life story, both as himself and interspersed with this story from his friends. I want the audience to know what it is to
    be a devout Muslim, the persecution that asylum seekers face, the fortitude and calm that Islam gives to someone persecuted because of this, the reactions and support
    in love of the community around him, both Muslim and non Muslim, and his occasional triumphs after much struggle against the system that is confining him despite
    the attempts to drive him into destitution.

    The Volcano is Dormant Forever
    Film type: Tragedy.
    Plot: Some guide of the present day presents his story of an extict volcano on which the trip is guided, and recounts the story of Euripides, who in myth wrote a final play
    in which he ascended purportedly here as God, to defy and overcome the then living volcano and its fire, and become as he believed this God himself. At the end of one of
    his plays, Euripides is proclaimed by others, and knows himself, that he is the greatest tragedean of all time. Facing his own death, he declares himself a god, and despite
    the urgings of others, he turns them back and ascends a volcano to defy God, to his certain and horrible death.

    The Return of the Living and The Absolution of The Dead

    The Terrible Destruction of the Shoah and the Aftermath of the Moon Landings
    1. Hitler as a child is strongly beaten by his father.
    2. Hitler greets Richard Strauss in a performance of Electra in Berlin.
    3. Heisenberg meets Neils Bohr in Copenhagen. The Manhatten programme begins with Wigner delivering a letter from Einstein to Rooseveldt.
    4. Ettore Majorana questioned on antigravity research. He goes missing in a boat trip. Turns up heading the Nazi nuclear bomb programme in the Buchenwald Concentration
    5. Strauss pleads with Hitler for his relatives and takes a train to Auschwitz. Confronted at the gates he is asked 'Are you mad?'
    6. Hitler agrees to the Duke of Windsor's plan to bomb London and install a Mosley government.
    7. Hitler, defeated by Peronist strategy at the battle of Kursk, instructs Bormann to lead Nazi submergence and evacuation plan to South America.
    8. Rigelians tell him Jewish scientists have leaked antigravity vacuum research to Satanist von Neumann. Himmler describes Bormann as 'that nasty man'.
    9. Peenemunde bombed. Martin Bormann, pursued by Soviet troops commits suicide.
    10. In the ruins of Berlin, Hitler shoots his alsatian and proceeds by underground tunnels out of the Bunker with Eva Braun. They meet Franco at Barcelona airport and proceed
    via Ascencion to Argentina.
    11. Hitler and Eva Braun go to an inaccessible ranch in Argentina with a good climate.
    12. A U-boat carrying Nazi bomb material arrives in New York.
    13. Peron starts Argentinan aircraft industry. Evita Peron gives labour rights.
    14. Klaus Barbie makes weekly trips between Argentina and CIA Headquarters in the US.
    15. von Braun heads US Moon programme.
    16. Hitler and Eva have third child. Hitler says he does not mind killing people, that way less animals get killed.
    17. Barbie captured in a restaurant by a Mossad agent.
    18. Peron slashes Agentine University research.
    19. Evita Peron poisoned. Mass grief.
    20. Eva Braun divorces Hitler. Hitler watches Moon landings on TV.
    21. Ettore Majorana develops Time Capsule to preserve Hitler.
    22. Peron has secret meeting in Franco's Spain with Che Guevara telling him 'he was dealing with forces he did not understand'.
    23. Bini (Ettore) with white hair has conversatons with a CERN employee in Switzerland, asking questions on a Mars colony.